Ugh can someone explain what is wrong with this picture (friends)?

I have friend #1 who divorced and single, but very sweet and agreeable. Friend #2 is married but her husband is her whipping boy...meaning he goes along with everything she wants to do and they pretend money and time are no objects...friend #3 is the direct/bossy friend who is married, works full time, goes to grad school, and has two kids. She has high expectations of herself and of everyone else. I am a stay at home mom with two kids and my husband works 60-70 hours a week, one hour away (commute). So friend #3 tries to plan a birthday party for friend #1 (keep in mind she is turning 32 so she's no little kid), but she creates the terms for this party, and it just doesn't work for me because of my family so I suggest different terms. Friend #2 looks like the good guy and says oh yeah I'll do whatever you want! Friend #3 gets mad at me and says we are best friends and we have never thrown a party for friend #1 so she figured we could do it. (None of us have ever thrown a party for any of us so where did that come from?). Friend #2 says oh yeah I agree and I'm down with that. I say well I tried to tell you when and what I could do, but we are still friends and still have quality time together, and isn't that good enough? Ackward silence...